Don’t Wrestle Pigs

Read

2 Timothy 2:23-26 "Don’t have anything to do with foolish and stupid arguments, because you know they produce quarrels. And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful. Opponents must be gently instructed, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth, and that they will come to their senses and escape from the trap of the devil, who has taken them captive to do his will."

Think

Lisa and I were trying to find a new restaurant to try. Before we went, I pulled up the reviews online. I wanted to check the menu, see what people thought, get a sense of the place. The first three reviews were horrendous. People were absolutely brutal. One reviewer called the food disgusting. Another attacked the owner personally. A third said they would rather eat cardboard. I sat there reading these comments and thought: if any of these people stood up in the middle of the restaurant and said what they had written online, the other diners would drag them out. But online? Online, people say things they would never say face to face.

There is a reason for that. Screens create distance. And distance creates courage. The kind of courage that is not really courage at all. It is cowardice with a keyboard. You would never walk up to a chef and tell him his food tastes like cardboard. You would never stand in the middle of a dining room and announce that the owner is incompetent. But give a person a screen and an anonymous username, and suddenly they are the bravest critic in the world. The screen removes accountability. It removes eye contact. It removes the social pressure that keeps us civil. And what is left is the rawest, most unfiltered version of what people actually think. The screen does not make people mean. It reveals the meanness that was already there, just waiting for an audience that could not see their face.

I described the comments section of the internet once as "the toilet of humanity." And I stand by that. The comments section is where people go to dump their worst thoughts, their cruelest opinions, their most reckless words. Nobody cleans it up. Nobody moderates it in any meaningful way. And when you jump into the comments section to argue, you are essentially diving into the toilet and wrestling around in it. You will not come out clean. You cannot. The environment is designed for filth, not for productive conversation.

Paul told Timothy: "Do not have anything to do with foolish and stupid arguments, because you know they produce quarrels." Notice what Paul did not say. He did not say, "Win the argument." He did not say, "Make your point." He did not say, "Defend yourself in every thread." He said do not have anything to do with it. Walk away. Disengage. Leave the toilet alone.

Jesus said something similar in Matthew 7:6: "Do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces." Why do you not wrestle pigs? Four reasons. First, because they are pigs. The environment is a pig pen, and pig pens are designed for filth, not for productive conversation. Second, because you will get muddy. You cannot wrestle in a pig pen and come out smelling like roses. The pig pen always wins. Third, because they will bite you. Jesus said they will "turn and tear you to pieces." The person who drags you into the mud is not looking for resolution. They are looking for a fight, and they will bite. Fourth, because you are wasting your time. Every minute spent in the mud is a minute stolen from the people and the calling that actually matter.

Technology has turned the entire internet into a potential pig pen. Every comments section, every reply thread, every quote tweet is an invitation to step into the mud. And the temptation is real. Someone says something wrong about your faith, your family, your values, your beliefs. Your fingers hover over the keyboard. Your blood pressure rises. Every fiber in your body wants to fire back. To correct them. To put them in their place. To win.

But winning in a pig pen is not winning. It is surviving the mud with slightly fewer bruises than the other person. And even then, you are still covered in mud. Your witness is compromised. Your peace is gone. Your time is wasted. And the person you were arguing with? They have already moved on to the next fight. They were never looking for truth. They were looking for a sparring partner.

Paul goes on to say that the Lord’s servant "must not be quarrelsome but must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful." That is the standard. Not quarrelsome. Kind. Teachable. Not resentful. Those qualities are almost impossible to maintain in a comments section. The format works against you. The character limit works against you. The anonymity works against you. The algorithm that rewards outrage over nuance works against you. The entire ecosystem is optimized for quarrels, not for kindness.

Here is the deal. Not every argument deserves your energy. Not every comment deserves a reply. Some fights are worth having. Real conversations with real people in real settings where body language and tone and mutual respect are present. Those fights matter. But most of what happens in the comments section is not a fight worth having. It is a pig pen. And the wisest thing you can do is walk away. Put the phone down. Close the laptop. Let the mud settle without your footprints in it. Your peace is worth more than the last word.

Apply

Walk past the pen – The next time you see a post, comment, or message that makes your blood boil, put the phone down for sixty seconds. Ask yourself: is this a conversation worth having, or am I about to wrestle in the mud? If it is the mud, move on.

Pray

Lord, give me the discernment to know which conversations are worth entering and which ones are pig pens. I confess that I have jumped into the mud too many times, thinking I could change someone’s mind in a comments section. Teach me to guard my words, protect my peace, and trust you with the outcomes. In Jesus’ name. Amen.